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Books to Read to Learn How to Raise Kids

 
Craftsman
 
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Craftsman
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07 February 2019 18:14
 

Hello All,

So far I have:

The Boy Crisis: Why Our Boys Are Struggling and What We Can Do About It. Warren Farrell PhD (Author), John Gray PhD (Author)
The Coddling of the American Mind - Jonathan Haidt
Why Gender Matters – Leonard Sax

It would be great to hear of more good books to read to help raising a child to be as capable as possible.

Cheers

 
GAD
 
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GAD
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07 February 2019 20:53
 

Kids don’t care about books, they have their own ideas and they will change you more then you change them.

 
 
Craftsman
 
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Craftsman
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07 February 2019 20:58
 
GAD - 07 February 2019 08:53 PM

Kids don’t care about books, they have their own ideas and they will change you more then you change them.

I’m referring to best practice to reduce the chance for kids to grow up with mental disorders for example (or be able to better handle them etc). No one has their “own” ideas from birth. I would say people are not able to actually think for themselves until their mid 20’s.

 

 
GAD
 
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GAD
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07 February 2019 21:13
 
Craftsman - 07 February 2019 08:58 PM
GAD - 07 February 2019 08:53 PM

Kids don’t care about books, they have their own ideas and they will change you more then you change them.

I’m referring to best practice to reduce the chance for kids to grow up with mental disorders for example (or be able to better handle them etc). No one has their “own” ideas from birth. I would say people are not able to actually think for themselves until their mid 20’s.

 

OK, good luck with that.

 
 
Craftsman
 
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Craftsman
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Joined  07-02-2019
 
 
 
07 February 2019 21:33
 
GAD - 07 February 2019 09:13 PM
Craftsman - 07 February 2019 08:58 PM
GAD - 07 February 2019 08:53 PM

Kids don’t care about books, they have their own ideas and they will change you more then you change them.

I’m referring to best practice to reduce the chance for kids to grow up with mental disorders for example (or be able to better handle them etc). No one has their “own” ideas from birth. I would say people are not able to actually think for themselves until their mid 20’s.

 

OK, good luck with that.

Your cognitive biases is incredible. If you are wrong, how would you know?

Why teach kids math’s or language? Kids will just form their own ideas! The environment in which a child is raise will either encourage or discourage certain behaviors or desires. A classic is food education.

 

 
GAD
 
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GAD
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07 February 2019 22:34
 
Craftsman - 07 February 2019 09:33 PM
GAD - 07 February 2019 09:13 PM
Craftsman - 07 February 2019 08:58 PM
GAD - 07 February 2019 08:53 PM

Kids don’t care about books, they have their own ideas and they will change you more then you change them.

I’m referring to best practice to reduce the chance for kids to grow up with mental disorders for example (or be able to better handle them etc). No one has their “own” ideas from birth. I would say people are not able to actually think for themselves until their mid 20’s.

 

OK, good luck with that.

Your cognitive biases is incredible. If you are wrong, how would you know?

Why teach kids math’s or language? Kids will just form their own ideas! The environment in which a child is raise will either encourage or discourage certain behaviors or desires. A classic is food education.

As I said good luck, you only have to look at the world to see that it’s not as easy as reading a book because every kid is unique. Come back in 20 years and tell us how it went.

 
 
Jan_CAN
 
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Jan_CAN
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08 February 2019 04:43
 

Hi Craftsman and welcome.

I commend you for wanting to know all you can about raising a child.  For those parents who themselves had good parents, they often seem to instinctually know how to do it well; however, everyone can benefit from learning from others, including from books.

Personally, I would concentrate on those books that aren’t based on the fad or issue-of-the-day, although books on specific issues (e.g. safety on the internet) could be helpful.  Several years ago, I read the following book which I found good:

Kids are Worth It! by Barbara Coloroso
https://www.amazon.com/kids-are-worth-Barbara-Coloroso/dp/0380719541

Jan

 
 
burt
 
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burt
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08 February 2019 09:18
 

Suggest reading the paper Universals of Child Rearing by Naomi Quinn in the book Anthropological Theory
(2005) SAGE Publications.

 
icehorse
 
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icehorse
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09 February 2019 08:18
 

In terms of developing STEM skills (just one aspect of parenting to be sure):

- read to them and encourage reading ASAP
- toys shouldn’t do stuff, it should be up to the kid to decide what a toy does.
- some “abstract” toys should be in the mix: Legos, blocks, cardboard boxes..

 
 
hannahtoo
 
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hannahtoo
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09 February 2019 18:52
 

Let the kids explore in the outdoors, get dirty.  Give them opportunities to play at the seashore, plant in the garden, roast marshmallows on a campfire, see the Milky Way, row a boat, fly a kite, poke at tidepool animals, sleep in a tent, climb a tree.  Let them love nature, which is their natural home.  Research summer camps where they can hike, swim, sing songs, play capture the flag, and learn about the natural world.

Every area has local books written on places to take kids outdoors.  Short hikes, picnic spots, sandy beaches, etc.  Search out the regional nature center.

[ Edited: 09 February 2019 18:55 by hannahtoo]
 
GAD
 
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GAD
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09 February 2019 19:11
 

The longer the list of opinions on how to how raise kids, the clearer it becomes that no one knows how to raise them.

 
 
Jan_CAN
 
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Jan_CAN
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09 February 2019 19:17
 
GAD - 09 February 2019 07:11 PM

The longer the list of opinions on how to how raise kids, the clearer it becomes that no one knows how to raise them.

And yet some pretty great kids got raised somehow or other.

 
 
GAD
 
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GAD
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09 February 2019 19:36
 
Jan_CAN - 09 February 2019 07:17 PM
GAD - 09 February 2019 07:11 PM

The longer the list of opinions on how to how raise kids, the clearer it becomes that no one knows how to raise them.

And yet some pretty great kids got raised somehow or other.

Yes, “somehow or other”.

 
 
Jan_CAN
 
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Jan_CAN
Total Posts:  2978
Joined  21-10-2016
 
 
 
09 February 2019 19:42
 
GAD - 09 February 2019 07:36 PM
Jan_CAN - 09 February 2019 07:17 PM
GAD - 09 February 2019 07:11 PM

The longer the list of opinions on how to how raise kids, the clearer it becomes that no one knows how to raise them.

And yet some pretty great kids got raised somehow or other.

Yes, “somehow or other”.

You’ve mentioned your kids in the past and they sound kind of great - don’t you think that perhaps it’s partly because of stuff you did?

 
 
GAD
 
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GAD
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Joined  15-02-2008
 
 
 
09 February 2019 20:10
 
Jan_CAN - 09 February 2019 07:42 PM
GAD - 09 February 2019 07:36 PM
Jan_CAN - 09 February 2019 07:17 PM
GAD - 09 February 2019 07:11 PM

The longer the list of opinions on how to how raise kids, the clearer it becomes that no one knows how to raise them.

And yet some pretty great kids got raised somehow or other.

Yes, “somehow or other”.

You’ve mentioned your kids in the past and they sound kind of great - don’t you think that perhaps it’s partly because of stuff you did?

Somehow or other smile

I love them and can guide them, protect them and provide opportunities for them, but they are their own little people and have their own damn ideas about how their life should work. It’s very annoying. But in the end their life will be what they make it, not me.

 
 
Jan_CAN
 
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Jan_CAN
Total Posts:  2978
Joined  21-10-2016
 
 
 
10 February 2019 05:38
 
GAD - 09 February 2019 08:10 PM
Jan_CAN - 09 February 2019 07:42 PM
GAD - 09 February 2019 07:36 PM
Jan_CAN - 09 February 2019 07:17 PM
GAD - 09 February 2019 07:11 PM

The longer the list of opinions on how to how raise kids, the clearer it becomes that no one knows how to raise them.

And yet some pretty great kids got raised somehow or other.

Yes, “somehow or other”.

You’ve mentioned your kids in the past and they sound kind of great - don’t you think that perhaps it’s partly because of stuff you did?

Somehow or other smile

I love them and can guide them, protect them and provide opportunities for them, but they are their own little people and have their own damn ideas about how their life should work. It’s very annoying. But in the end their life will be what they make it, not me.

It’s in the kids’ handbook to be annoying.  Just as the good stuff you mention is in the parents’ handbooks, along with some helpful specifics.  Yeah, in the end their lives are their own to make of what they will, but parents have the power to send them off happily into the world, or alternatively to load them up with excess baggage they’ll have to deal with if they can.

Of course there’s no such thing as just one kind of good parent; however, there are some definite ‘dos & don’ts’.  A parent consciously thinking through what and why they do what they do and the potential consequences can prevent them from making or repeating mistakes of the past.

 

 
 
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