“Alice! Illicit fart engine!”

 
Nhoj Morley
 
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Nhoj Morley
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09 July 2019 01:22
 

The White House communication folks used artificial intelligence to create the perfect bullet point for Trump and his spokespeople. This is to be blurted out whenever an opponent has spoken for twelve seconds. “Alice! Illicit fart engine!” is easy to imagine spoken by Rudy or Kellyanne or even the mighty T-wrecks.

The point is to derail complexity before it has a chance to be expressed. The T administration turned to AI to find the one universal phrase that could derail any topic. A phrase so aggressively obtuse that no matter how hard anyone tried, no one can find its context, connect it to the conversation or compose an appropriate response. “Alice! Illicit fart engine!” See how the phrase remains meaningless even in a paragraph that explains it.

This physically endears some listeners whose attention cannot endure twelve seconds of continuous work. The relief from brain laboring will, with repetition, become a pleasurable feeling associated with the talking heads who use it. The blurt is followed by tiny logic. If this, then that. If all the logic is tiny, some folks will find that it further endears the user because it treats them with respect and reassures that things are simple.

Simplicity has become courtesy and complexity has become rude and presumptuous. Simplicity is in high demand because there is not enough time for complexity. Most TV interview questions come with a caution about how many seconds can be spared for the answer. What’s the hurry? Can this haste be ascribed to any external factors? Is there less time now then was two hundred years ago?

Fans of complexity find this frustrating. No matter how fast a fan of complexity can talk and express their complex views, a non-fan can say “Alice! Illicit fart engine!” even faster.

That is the ultimate mission of the T-team- to defeat complexity by eliminating the long time frames that allow it to unfold. This can be done without ever winning an argument or defending one’s reasoning. By shrinking the public canvas, only the tiniest pictures can be seen. Only the quick and tiny voices can be heard. That makes social media the preferred forum and journalism’s practitioners into enemies of the tiny people.

They not tiny in stature. They are short in thought. Inside their brains, their minds cast a tiny footprint. Many who have done their best to serve the Tiny Administration have found the shoes too tiny to fill. The goal is to Make America Tiny Again but any sympathizer of complexity knows that America was never as tiny as the T’s have already made it.

It is time to admit that the war is on and that, no matter which side you’re on, some of those around you see you as the enemy. Combat will take the form of imposed inconveniences, closed doors and urine-spiced tacos.

Knowing friend and foe will not be easy though there are some methods of determining who are the tiny people.

One way is to use an existing audio recording or make one of your own. Find an app that allows increasing playback to 130% or so and listen to what happens. Try it on one of The Boss’s podcasts for a references. Notice how he sounds goofy. Now try it on Rudy or another popular T-spokesperson. It’s not goofy. It sounds like a cranky toddler who doesn’t want to go to bed. Their reasoning unfolds like crazy cookie-jar alibis. Emotion makes its musical and even jazzy. Try this on the folks around you. Use any topic and make a reading on a scale from childish to just goofy.

An easier if less precise test is turning on a drum machine. Adjust the tempo until it seems to drive the speech along. With tiny people, this is easy. With The Boss, for example, it is impossible. Tiny-ness is synchronized. It has a pulse. This is a less certain measure of tiny-ness since many complexity-sympathizers have learned to ‘do’ tiny-ness when needed.

We should hear the pulse as war-drums and an indication that the T’s are gaining ground. Newer PBS documentaries have drum machine behind the narration. We can’t watch a nature show without a shuffling pulse to shovel it into our brains? Complexity’s inner perimeter has been compromised. We’re getting tinier.

The best method is simply to listen. Tiny people use words with magic powers. As if a word is an actual attribute of what it describes. For example, if seven out of ten people would now use the word ‘crisis’ to describe events at the border, the T’s can use the word’s power to make us tinier. A crisis demands a quick response from a decisive commander. Thoughtfulness has failed or there wouldn’t be a crisis, right? Dry, complex pictures with a lot of detail might be more true but tiny pictures with a pulse might as well be true. In a thirty second race, which one is going to be true first?

It is true that the universally-derailing bullet point came from artificial intelligence. In the tiny world, it is as true as it needs to be.

[ Edited: 09 July 2019 02:06 by Nhoj Morley]
 
 
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09 July 2019 09:54
 

I think I could make an understandable story out of this phrase, but I’ll spare you.

 
Antisocialdarwinist
 
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Antisocialdarwinist
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09 July 2019 15:03
 

It’s easy to make things complicated, harder to make them simple.

 
 
nonverbal
 
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nonverbal
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09 July 2019 21:14
 
Nhoj Morley - 09 July 2019 01:22 AM

. . .

One way is to use an existing audio recording or make one of your own. Find an app that allows increasing playback to 130% or so and listen to what happens. Try it on one of The Boss’s podcasts for a references. Notice how he sounds goofy. Now try it on Rudy or another popular T-spokesperson. It’s not goofy. It sounds like a cranky toddler who doesn’t want to go to bed. Their reasoning unfolds like crazy cookie-jar alibis. Emotion makes its musical and even jazzy. Try this on the folks around you. Use any topic and make a reading on a scale from childish to just goofy.
. . .

It would seem that prehistoric emotional-calamity/nicety noises we once emitted preceded and were perhaps necessary for verbal precision to evolve as quickly as it seems to have done.

Words somehow, at some point, rose to the Darwinian surface. I remember back when I was a pre-teen with my friends inventing our own verbal bits and pieces, which is typical for kids that age to do. Having achieved that tendency is humanity’s, so far, dominant (domineering?) accomplishment.

 
 
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10 July 2019 09:18
 
Antisocialdarwinist - 09 July 2019 03:03 PM

It’s easy to make things complicated, harder to make them simple.

A judge once said: “A trial lawyer is someone who takes something very complicated and makes it very simple.  A ‘litigator’ is someone who takes something very simple and makes it very complicated.”

 
icehorse
 
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11 July 2019 08:08
 

Yup, most of “the people” want to live in a sound bite society. Nuance is shunned, false dilemmas are revered.

 
 
Nhoj Morley
 
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11 July 2019 11:48
 

Do we agree that there is complexity in the world to be simplified? Is all complexity artifact?

The President seems to simplify things without breaking a sweat. Is he simplifying the world or making it tinier?

How does one know when they are shunning nuance? It would be exactly like shunning ambiguity or insincere complexity or some other fault. Nuance is known because it is seen through all the way. What is actually being shunned is seeing things through all the way.

If a society can convince their busy and hurried citizens that there simply isn’t enough time for nuance, none will notice that their minds are getting tinier. There will be some needed nuance from time to time and the tiny shall leave it to the Top Men. Democracy becomes a scorecard for market penetration. Politics becomes a reason to shout.

 
 
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11 July 2019 14:12
 
Nhoj Morley - 11 July 2019 11:48 AM

Do we agree that there is complexity in the world to be simplified? Is all complexity artifact?

The President seems to simplify things without breaking a sweat. Is he simplifying the world or making it tinier?

How does one know when they are shunning nuance? It would be exactly like shunning ambiguity or insincere complexity or some other fault. Nuance is known because it is seen through all the way. What is actually being shunned is seeing things through all the way.

If a society can convince their busy and hurried citizens that there simply isn’t enough time for nuance, none will notice that their minds are getting tinier. There will be some needed nuance from time to time and the tiny shall leave it to the Top Men. Democracy becomes a scorecard for market penetration. Politics becomes a reason to shout.

He is not actually simplifying anything.  He has everything down to one concept - “Me and everything else”.  If it’s good for him, it’s great.  If it’s against him, it’s very, very bad.  It may seem simple, but that throws the whole world into turmoil when you are in his position.  So it makes the world incredibly complicated and almost impossible to understand.  There is no end to the chaos that he could create.