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Marriage, Sexuality, and Premarital Sex

 
Antisocialdarwinist
 
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Antisocialdarwinist
Total Posts:  7393
Joined  08-12-2006
 
 
 
07 March 2020 09:34
 
icehorse - 07 March 2020 08:27 AM

Fear is a poor motivator.

That claim flies in the face of millions of years of evolution. If fear isn’t a powerful motivator, then what evolutionary purpose does it serve? Anyway, fear isn’t the same thing as shame, so it’s a moot point.

icehorse - 07 March 2020 08:27 AM

On the other hand, the passion to achieve mastery in a thing is an incredibly strong, lasting motivator. And mastery-adjacent behaviors are almost as good as motivators. For example, if a young woman has a passion for rock climbing, then she will also be steadily motivated to life weights because “that’s what rock climbers do”. And getting pregnant is NOT what rock climbers do.

So the solution is to instill a passion for rock climbing in your daughter? I realize that’s just an example, but instilling passions in people seems problematic to me. My mother tried to instill a passion for the piano in me but achieved the opposite result.

If your daughter happens to develop a passion for something that’s incompatible with getting knocked up, then yes, I agree completely. But isn’t that just luck, not something you can count on? Just as likely she’ll develop a passion for being popular with the boys.

 
 
icehorse
 
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icehorse
Total Posts:  8814
Joined  22-02-2014
 
 
 
07 March 2020 09:55
 

asd:

That claim flies in the face of millions of years of evolution. If fear isn’t a powerful motivator, then what evolutionary purpose does it serve? Anyway, fear isn’t the same thing as shame, so it’s a moot point.

  (in response to me saying that fear is a poor motivator)

Let me refine that a bit. Fear works in the short term. It’s not so great in terms of establishing behavior patterns.

asd:

I realize that’s just an example, but instilling passions in people seems problematic to me. My mother tried to instill a passion for the piano in me but achieved the opposite result.

Right, but I don’t think that someone can directly “instill” passion in another person. OTOH, a parent can live a life in pursuit of mastery, demonstrate through actions (not words), the benefits that come in such pursuits, and support their child’s explorations in pursuit of skill acquisition. So for example, we could demonstrate that gifts of painting sets or toolboxes are more forthcoming than Xboxes.

 
 
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