You are fully and unconditionally loved. You are both a necessary bad guy, and one of the most important good guys. Your ability to read black men has been called into question, however, and you’ve once again reminded us of the impossible task of trying to determine menace while contemplating your life flashing before your eyes - even though Floyd wasn’t remotely that. All of the words in the world going back through history made fickle of people who tried to write about the difference between something you see and what’s actually going on. So while your fuck ups equal the worst of what society has to offer, we’ve given you so many chances in this category because you know we wouldn’t want to be in your shoes. But it’s time to do better. I’m sorry and we love you.
Killing someone you don’t have to kill should be interpreted as a sign of incompetence rather than bravery. Maybe we ask too much, but at the same time it’s too much to ask your fellow officers and your immediate employers to cover for you when you’re not up to all that we ask.
When one of the mantras of your job is, “Better to be judged by twelve and carried by six,” then you should seriously reconsider keeping the job.
Well written, jb.